5 Of Louisiana’s Dumbest Criminals
There is a reason why criminals always get caught. It's because for the most part they are stupid. The ones that are not stupid have such big egos that they must brag about their crimes. That verbose attitude usually leads police right to their doorstep where they are amazed they were apprehended.
These are stories where very little brainpower was employed by either the criminals or the cops. In fact the police had such a small challenge in catching these candidates for a Darwin Award that I am sure they hardly broke a sweat, unless it was from laughter at the perpetrators of these inane attempts at criminal behavior.
The year was 2014. In the Hub City of Lafayette a young man decided his glory road to riches ran through the cash register of a local convenience store. His Modus operandi, conceal his face with a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle mask and threaten the clerk with a stick. The crime failed. Lacorrion Detron Turner was charged with first degree robbery when he was apprehended a short distance from the store while trying to make his getaway on foot.
It was 2008, the city was Lake Charles. You wouldn't think of Lake Charles as the kind of place where car thieves and crackheads would hang out, but you'd be wrong. It seems that Lake Charles Police had pulled over a car they believed to be stolen. They called the owner to inform them their vehicle had been found. Some 30 minutes later the owner of the car returned the missed call and told the officer that answered the call she would like to purchase $150 worth of crack cocaine. They agreed to make the sale and showed up to make the arrest.
I would imagine getting out of jail would be a joyous occasion. I have never been in jail but I have been on conference calls and I can somewhat relate to what the freedom of being released feels like. In Shreveport a man being held at the Bossier Maximum Security Facility just couldn't wait to get high. He decided the parking lot was a great place to get his weed on. Believe it or not the cops monitor the parking lots of prisons. The man was promptly returned to jail.
The year was 2005. According to all the crime dramas I watch on TV most criminals look for an easy mark. What could be easier than robbing a beauty school right? Well an unsuspecting robber in Shreveport found these beauticians to be a little more than he could handle when he burst in and tried to steal from them. The students and instructors at Blalock's School of Beauty proceeded to beat him with curling irons and sticks. He was injured so seriously he required hospitalization before he could be taken away to the safety of the jail.
The year was 2002. What could be easier for cops to track than a trail of doughnut crumbs? I am guessing that two very hungry thieves didn't think about that when they commandeered a Krispy Kreme Donut truck and left a 15 mile trail of donuts for officers to follow. According to reports donuts were falling out of the truck as police officers attempted to pull it over. As you might imagine the Slidell Police Department took a lot of ribbing over this case but they did gain notoriety with an appearance on The Tonight Show.