Dumb Reasons That You Were Dumped

We have all been in relationships. Some work and you are still with that person. Others, well, they just didn't work out. It could be something serious like infidelity, or as trivial as you didn't like their choice of gumbo.

I know, you are thinking, "someone would get dumped over something so stupid as their taste in gumbo?" The answer is Yes.

Let's start with the guys and their "dumb" reasons for a break-up:

1. "You have too many sex toys, which is intimidating."
2. "You ignored all my requests to leave the toilet seat UP, which slows me down."
3. "Your grandmother keeps giving me the eye and it creeps me out."
4. "I had to play football in a dirty uniform because you didn't wash it in time."
5. "My friends keep telling me you're not attractive and I can't take it."
6. "You claimed to be a fan of DOSTOYEVSKY but couldn't name Raskolnikov's sister in 'Crime and Punishment', so I think you're a fraud."
7. "You said you'd seen BLINK 182 here, but they've never played here, which means you aren't trustworthy."
8. "You beat me all the time on Xbox and I can't take it."
9. "Your cooking isn't as good as my mom's and I don't think it's going to improve."
10. "You wouldn't pick me up after a night out, so I had to pay $24 for a taxi."

And ladies, I am sorry to say, but you aren't off the hook with this one:

1. "The way you pronounce words bothers me."
2. "I don't like your aftershave, so this isn't going to work."
3. "You never flush the toilet."
4. "You don't cut your fingernails often enough."
5. "Your breathing is too heavy."
6. "I don't like the newspaper you read."
7. "You're too close to your mother."
8. "Our TV shows just aren't compatible."
9. You're TOO CLEAN . . . and you shower twice a day, which is too much."
10. "You won't put on the heat when it's cold and tell me to wear a sweater, but my sweater is too tight and I don't want to wear it."