Sometimes I’m randomly deep
The picture above was sent to me by my friend, Melissa, on the left. I met the lady in the middle when I was just 12, and she gave me the ability to be on the radio. I brought my friends and my brother, and the rest is history.
I wrote this Wednesday evening in front of Golden Corral on Youree Dr. I was waiting to meet my parents so I could indulge in the chocolate fountain of goodness, when suddenly this occurred to me...
They say that the moment you lose hope, you lose everything. Hope is something I have clutched to, probably too tightly at times. I have realized that all those years of bad relationships have taught me more than I can even explain. I have been forced to find my backbone. I have been forced to draw boundaries and hold myself and others accountable. I have never been grateful for that until today.
All those lonely nights, when I was alone or even next to someone, were molding me into a strong person. Its so odd how we don't see how we are changing until we are looking back. I cherish those memories that I once viewed as nightmares. I appreciate that God isn't going to lay all my wishes in my lap until he knows I can hold onto them.
I know that no matter what happens, I am self sufficient and that the people in my life are there to enhance it, not hold it in bondage.
I know that I am enough. I am good enough and I am capable enough to do anything because God has brought me through fire. And my burns are not something I view as ugly anymore, they are callouses for the next fire, should I have to go through one again.
I know I will make it through tomorrow because the day I thought I hit rock bottom, was just a tree branch that had caught me before I had to fall a little bit more. And I still have hope.