Pregnancy Rumors Do Not Make Babies Appear in Jennifer Aniston’s Womb
Hey, guess what? Jennifer Aniston still isn’t pregnant.
Stop trying to knock her up, internet. That’s not how babies are made.
The newest false report claiming the 43-year-old actress is in the family way comes courtesy of Star Magazine, which must have enjoyed concocting a story that included the ‘Friends’ star crying “tears of joy” when she found out she was pregnant with a baby girl.
So why hasn’t she told the world’s womb-watchers?
“Jen is superstitious and scared to death that making a huge public deal over her pregnancy might jinx her,” the supposed insider said. “It took her years to get pregnant and she’s aware of the complications that could arise because of her age, so she and Justin have decided to keep silent as they prepare for the baby’s arrival.”
The report claims both Aniston and baby daddy Justin Theroux are overjoyed to be bringing their out-of-wedlock kid into the world and that Jen is currently painting the nursery bright pink with a safari theme. Because she’s getting married in Africa. Derp.
According to the magazine, the fake baby is due this May. Wonder where she’s fake registered? We just can’t wait for the fake presents at the fake baby shower.
This isn’t the first time that the tabloids have tried to stick a baby in Jennifer Aniston — and it certainly won’t be the last.
Aniston’s representatives have confirmed that the supposed bump, which sparked the trillionth ‘Jennifer Aniston is Preggers’ tabloid cover, isn’t a fetus. Which are claims they’ll likely have to make until the end of time if Jen dares to have a big lunch that renders her stomach less than concave.